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Relationship: Dealing With An Ex

On Friday 28th of June I walked into the live studio of 103.7Excel Fm, as usual, my co-presenter Holy Michael was seated on the other side of the table. He was touching the console trying to set things rights as our favourite Friday show close and personal was just a few minutes and I was late again. Blame the rain and my attempt to do my makeup after dozing.

I remember telling myself " its just a few minutes sleep and you will wake up wear your clothes and makeup also put some write up down on a paper" but then when I woke up, I had slept for an hour.
The show started and just like its name it was a close and personal topic. Dealing with your Ex.
Many persons don't want to be associated with their ex for any reason. some see it as a plague while others see it as looking backwards. well, one thing for sure is:
Breaking up can be difficult and hurtful but relating and being friends with an ex is for the brave and matured minded.
The question is how do you relate with your ex?  Do you remain friends or keep them 100-yards away?
I don't think there is anything wrong in relating with an ex only if you can handle it maturely so you or no else gets hurt.

Here are excerpts from what we talked about:
Do not belittle your ex: There is this tendency that after a breakup, you mind get irritated by your ex. some person even go ask themselves "How did I even date this person" I remember someone telling me each time she sees her ex she feels like throwing up because she can't imagine how she brought herself to date him but mind you, she was once crazy about this guy.
Do not speak evil about your ex before anyone. This world is a very small place. Holy Michael shared a story about a man and his wife who divorced after 2-years of marriage and the woman went about denting his image before anyone who gives her a listening ear. Months later she applied for a job and needed just the signature of the Human resource manager of the company for her to start the job. Coincidentally her ex-husband was the HR manager of the company and he refused to sign that document for her. Only if she knew how to watch her mouth?

Avoid bitterness; Just like the story above one of the things a break up can do to you if you don't put yourself is that it makes you bitter especially when you feel you have put in your best and all into the relationship and finally it doesn't work you feel cheated and pained. Sweetheart, the best is meant for you. So take your time and heal before stretching out or receiving a hand of friendship.


Apply the 3-months rule: There are huge chances that after a break up your ex may be hanging around. Though that depends on how you parted ways.  Many can't stand seeing their ex after a breakup because they still feel something for them especially when you parted ways not because you no longer want the relationship but because of medical issues or other related issues such as family disagreement or rejection. There are also chances of the both of you making mistakes that might hurt you such as having a rekindled flame. You might want to stay away from them. Using the six months rule may help. Some person during this period they block their ex from all forms of possible communication until they are sure they are healed and have moved. For me, I find blocking each other unnecessary but if you keep pushing to see me, I will tell u plainly I need time to heal.

Avoid Stalking: Stalking won't help you at all. Many stalk their ex after a breakup they check them out on social media, who they went out with. If they have moved on. Who is their current partner? Sometimes they start disturbing the partner of their ex. Hello honey, that's not proper at all, you are doing more harm to yourself than good. This is where you need to block them if it will help you become better.


Avoid flaunting your partner before them: Sweetheart, flaunting your new partner is a sign of childishness and means you still care about their thoughts.
How do you deal with your ex?
How are you maintaining that relationship or did you cut the line?

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